How to Talk Dirty in Bed

Talking Dirty in the Bedroom

Start simple. You don't need to immediately say a well-rehearsed line. Position yourself close to your partner's ear. Once your intimacy has progressed, try saying something like this softly into their ear: "Mmmmmm" "Ohhhhh" "Yes" "Ahhhh"

Turn it up a notch. You don't need to say a whole sentence. You're merely saying one or two words that will increase the intensity of what's going on in bed. You could whisper these into your partner's ear or even try saying them with a moan: "Keep going" "Wow" "Faster" "Deeper" "Harder" "Don't stop"

Go for full phrases. Once you've become comfortable saying simple sounds or easy phrases, you're ready to use full on phrases. Both long and short phrases are effective and really vary on people and the situation. If you are still unsure what you should say, try some of these out: "You feel so good" "I want to feel you deeper" "I want to be yours" "I wish you could do that all night!"

Say what you are feeling. You don't have to be so mechanical about talking dirty during sex. Just say what you're feeling, what you're doing, or what you're experiencing in that moment. As you start speaking dirty in the bedroom, try to avoid crude terms until you have a good idea of how your partner will respond.

Describe what works and what doesn't. Afterwards, take some time to go over what worked and what didn't. You won't be an expert instantly, so you'll need to give your partner and yourself time to discuss your turn-ons and turn-offs. The best time to talk about these is right after sex, when both of you are relaxed and want to be close.

Tell them to talk back. If you are feeling the urge, just whisper to your partner during sex, "talk dirty to me." You may find that even this phrase will spice up the action. There is also a chance that your partner is turned on by this invitation and could really move things forward.

Talk dirty as a form of foreplay. Many couples will initiate foreplay with speaking dirty to one another. You could call your partner on the phone and tell them how you're excited to see them and drop a simple line like, "I'd like to kiss and nibble your neck." Catching your partner off guard with dirty talk could lead to an exciting night.

Experiment with your voice. If it feels natural, modulate your voice when getting close to your partner. Changing the way you say something in order to release what you are feeling can elevate both of your moods. Whether you scream, whisper, or moan, release whatever you're feeling. Respect your partner and be careful not to put them out of their comfort zone.

Communicating Without Words

Moan when the feeling is right. You don't always have to say words in order to spice up communication during sex. Researchers found that nonverbal communication is more linked to sexual satisfaction than verbal communication. Moaning is an easy first step, that won't feel too outside your comfort zone, but it will excite things. Don't over-exaggerate.

Breathe and sigh louder than normal. Increasing the volume at which you breathe or sigh, will help your intimacy become more vocal.

Use your body language. You can communicate a lot to your partner by softly biting your lip. Body language can get points across in the bedroom, even if you're not trying to reveal something. Careful if you are prone to holding in your emotions because they'll come out through your body language. This is why it's important to be aware of your body language before sex and use it to your advantage during sex. What position you choose can say a lot. For instance, if you go on top, then you have full control of your pleasure and your partners'.

Use eye contact. Eye contact can speak the loudest if used at the right time in the bedroom. It can be a great way to initiate things. During sex, eye contact allows you to read your partner's facial expressions and help you gauge if things are working.

Relaxing and Preparation

Practice relaxing activities. If you are not use to talking dirty in the bedroom, you might feel anxious or worried. These feelings can overwhelm your thoughts and cause your intimacy to be ruined. Practice deep breathing exercises or even try yoga.

Forget your worries about being sexy. Focus more on the moment. If you're prone to feeling insecure you could prepare the bedroom or your wardrobe to boost your self-esteem. Set-up the mood lighting with candles or use a thin blanket draped over a light to dim the atmosphere.

Watch true romance movies. Don't get inspiration for talking dirty from porn. Porn is a poor representation of genuine intimacy between a couple. Watch a good movie like Match Point, Unfaithful, or Y Tu Mama Tambien. These are also great movies to watch with your partner that will get the blood moving.

Have fun! It's not supposed to be serious, and it's more fun when you can play around with ideas and words.

Research different adjectives. Say them out loud to yourself or try using them in a sentence like normal. The more you become comfortable saying words like "sexy," "breasts," "vagina," or "penis," the less frightening the words are. They're just parts of the human anatomy.

Add verbs to your adjectives. Doing this will give your phrases an air of personality. Verbs commonly used are 'stroke,' 'squeeze,' 'suck,' or 'touch'.