Preparing to Say “I Love You”
Find the right time and place. Telling someone you love them is a personal, special affair. You want the moment to be perfect. Pick a location that is private, perhaps even meaningful to your relationship, and a time that is appropriate. Don't express your love for her in the middle of class. If you are with a group of people, pull her aside. You can plan a special date for the occasion. Take her on a walk or a picnic. Tell her during a dinner you prepared for her.
Practice what you are going to say. Saying “I love you” for the first time is really scary. If you’re nervous, planning what you are going to say can boost your confidence. Think about what you want her to know, then rehearse your declaration of love. Instead of just saying "I love you," consider going deeper. For example: Give her reasons why you love her. Tell her when you fell in love with her. Let her know how special she is to you.
Don’t worry if she doesn't say it back right away. In addition to preparing what you will say, you should also prepare for her response to those three little words. Ideally, she will say, “I love you too!” However, she may not feel the same way about you. She might ignore your comment or divert the conversation to a new topic. If this happens, do not ask her, “well, do you love me too?” Be prepared to give her some time and space to digest what you said. Try to go on with the date as normal. Remain calm and mature if she rejects you. Have a positive, kind response prepared—your maturity just might impress her.
Saying the Words
Say, “I love you.” When the two of you are alone and the moment feels right, muster up the confidence to tell her, “I love you.” Look her in the eye, smile, and tell her, “I love you.” The timing doesn’t need to be perfect and the moment doesn’t have to be accompanied by a grand gesture, it just needs to be genuine. Tell her when you fell in love with her and or why you love her.
Show her that you love her. In addition to telling her “I love you,” you can also show her how much you care. After all, actions speak louder than words! Support her by attending all of her sporting events, writing her notes of encouragement, and helping her meet her goals. Here are some other ways that you can show her your love: Always treat her with respect and kindness. Don’t mistreat her or abuse her trust. If she tells you that she needs you for something, do everything you can to show up for her. You should also make time for her, and—eventually—be willing to talk about future plans with her. Go out of your way to make her happy. If she’s having a rough day, bring her flowers to cheer her up. Stand up for her. When someone bullies or insults her, shut down their negative behavior.
Write her a love note. While some people prefer to say, “I love you,” others have an easier time expressing themselves through writing—everyone loves a good love note! When the moment feels right, hand her the note in passing, give it to her with a small gift, or slip it in her hand at the end of the date. You can write a short, simple note, a heart-felt love letter, or even a sincere poem. Don't text or private message her, "I love you” or "I <3 U."
Be considerate of her response. After she has heard or read those three little words, give her a moment to process and react. When she is ready to respond, give her your complete attention. Listen to what she has to say and react accordingly. Hopefully she will return the sentiment and say, “I love you too!” Don’t press her for an immediate response. Don’t tell her how you thought she would feel or react.
Determining if Your Feelings are Love
Consider if you try to impress her. When you are in love with a girl, you are willing to do anything that makes her like you and notice you. You may try to impress her by taking risks or going above and beyond to help others. You may also try to impress her with your ability to play an instrument, play a sport, or show off another talent. If your actions are now driven by the ulterior motive of catching her attention, you may truly love her.
Determine if she is always on your mind. When you love a girl, it is very common to think about her constantly. Do you find that your mind unexpectedly wanders to thoughts of her throughout the day? Have you stopped to wonder if she is thinking about you too? If she is constantly on your mind, you may love her.
Evaluate if she makes you want to be a better person. When you fall in love with a girl, you may have a strong desire to become the man you feel she deserves. You may feel the need to improve your grades or behavior at school. You may start working out or attending a religious service. If you are willing to make an effort to improve yourself on her behalf, you may be in love with an incredible girl.
Examine if you want to see her happy. As you fall in love with a girl, you may make it your priority to make her happy. In order to ease her stress during exam week, you may volunteer to help her study, revise her paper, or complete her chores. When she becomes sick, you may insist on taking care of her and getting whatever she needs. When she is having a rough day, you may go out of your way to make her laugh and smile so she forgets about her troubles. If you are devoting time and energy to making her happy, you may love her.
Be certain about your decision. The three little words, “I love you,” pack a huge meaning. Once you express your love, the nature of your relationship with this girl will change for better or for worse. Prior to making this declaration, ask yourself the following questions: Are you truly in love with her? Does she share your understanding of the word “love?” Are you telling her “I love you” in the hopes that you will get something in return.
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