How to Politely Tell Someone They Smell
Approach them privately and speak candidly about their bad smell. This is the best strategy when you're dealing with a good friend, close family member, or your romantic partner. These people know you mean well and aren't trying to hurt your feelings. Most importantly, you're trying to help them so they don't continue embarrassing themselves with their BO. Be kind when you bring up their smell, even if you know them well. Only joke about it if you're certain the other person would find it funny. Be understanding and non-judgmental. It's possible the other person already knows about their bad smell, but they can't help it because of a health condition or because they were never taught proper hygiene. They may also not know how to tell they have BO. In any case, offer to do what you can to help. Below is an example of someone telling their friend they smell while being kind and understanding. "Hey, you may know this already, but in case you don't, I just wanted to tell you that your body odor isn't that great. I don't want you to feel embarrassed about it, but I know I would appreciate it if someone I loved and trusted told me I didn't smell good."
Gift them with antiperspirant or soap to inspire them to clean up. For people you don't know very well or only have an acquaintance with – like a coworker – a subtle gift of antiperspirant, body spray, or body soap may help you drop a hint without being too direct. Depending on whether the other person is aware of their BO or not, a gift of deodorant or body spray alone might be too overt of a hint and could hurt the other person's feelings. Consider giving it to them as part of a larger gift with other, non-scented items in it to make your true intentions less obvious. If the person who smells bad is your coworker and you work with several other people in an office setting, give them all the same thing so it doesn't look like you're singling anyone out.
Put enough physical distance between you to mask their stench. This may only be possible if the person who smells works in a different office than you or is a friend or family member you only see occasionally. It's easy enough to keep your distance from someone who works across the hall or a distant cousin you only see during the holidays. But for people you interact with daily, you may need to try telling them directly, giving them a gift, or talking to your manager about it.
Ask management or Human Resources to address your coworker's BO. This should be a last resort option, as it could potentially cause your coworker a lot of embarrassment. Only use this tactic when the other person's smell is disrupting your day or making it difficult for you to do your job. As a manager, when you approach an employee about their smell, make the conversation quick and to the point; avoid prolonging it so you don't needlessly humiliate them. Remember that they may not know about or be able to control their body odor if it's resulting from a health condition, so opt for a kind, dignified tone instead of joking or sounding stern. As a coworker, avoid talking to your peer about their BO issue unless you have a really good relationship with them in and outside of work. Peer-to-peer conversations about serious matters like this don't carry the weight of authority that a supervisor-to-employee conversation does. Furthermore, you risk offending your coworker and may cause them to try to retaliate against you by telling HR you harassed them.
Establish a dress code at work that requires better hygiene. If you're a manager or the owner of a business and you notice that one or more of your employees has a BO problem, you can change the dress code to ensure they come to work with better hygiene. For example, you can even add that all employees are required to wear antiperspirant or deodorant.
How to Describe Someone's Body Odor
Urine Smell When urine smells, it usually means it contains a high concentration of bacteria. The stench is similar to ammonia, a pungent gas made of nitrogen and hydrogen. Someone who smells like this may have urinated on themselves or hasn't washed their clothes or body in a long time. They may also be suffering from underlying health issues such as a kidney infection, a urinary tract infection (UTI), or uncontrolled Type 2 diabetes.
Fish Smell A body odor with a foul, fishy smell typically comes from a bacterial infection in women called bacterial vaginosis. In this condition, the bacteria that grows naturally in the vagina is thrown out of balance and becomes overgrown. BV is most common in women who are sexually active or regularly douche (i.e., wash out) their vagina.
Cat Pee Smell Cat urine smells strongly of ammonia, especially if the cat emptied their bladder recently or peed outside their litterbox. Someone who smells like cat pee may be wearing clothes or shoes their cat urinated on (without knowing it).
Poop Smell You already know what a poop smell is and where it comes from. Someone may smell like this if they haven't cleaned themselves properly after using the restroom or – if they're a parent – their child defecated on them and the stench still lingers.
Dirty Sock Smell A dirty sock smell is mildewy and foul. Someone may smell like this when they're re-wearing unwashed clothes with bacteria built up on them or if they left their wet clothes to sit in the washer for hours or days.
Onion or Garlic Smell When we eat sulfur-rich foods like onions, garlic, or even eggs, our bodies often secrete the sulfur into our sweat. This is why you may have noticed your armpits smelling like onion or garlic when you forgot to put on deodorant.
How to Compliment Someone's Smell
Tell them outright how good they smell if you know them well. If someone close to you, like a romantic partner, friend, or family member, is wearing a scent you enjoy, feel free to tell them they smell good directly. Since they know you so well, they'll appreciate your opinion and may even let you know what the scent is so you can get it yourself. These are some fun options for telling someone close to you that they smell good. "You sure do smell good! Are you wearing a scent?" "I love how you smell today!" "I don't know what scent you're using, but it's great!
Subtly reference someone's good smell if you're not close to them. When a coworker, fellow student, or someone you don't know very well (or at all) smells good, you can still compliment them. Just remember to adopt a subtler approach in these instances so you don't embarrass the other person or make them feel uncomfortable. Some people may take commenting about their scent as a type of flirting, as well, so if that's not your goal, you definitely want to avoid confronting them directly. These are polite, non-offensive ways you can let someone you're not close to that they smell good. "It smells good in here! Whatever scent that is, I like it!" "That's a nice scent you're wearing! Can you tell me what it is so I can get some for myself?" "Do you mind if I ask what scent you have on? It smells great and I think my partner would like it if I wore it."
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